Complaint Department Grenade

Image via Wikipedia

Writing PromptWrite a formal complaint letter to your deepest, darkest fear.
(From: Writers Digest)

K. Paterson
123 Insane Lane
Somewhereville, Nowhere

Attn: Death
β„… Crypt Keeper

Dear: Death

I am writing this letter to file a formal complaint with you. The constant anxiety and harassment that you have bestowed upon me shows a serious lack for customer satisfaction.

I have previously expressed my concern with the over abundance of information you have been providing me on your product, and I am again requesting now that you remove me for your contact list immediately. I do not wish to receive any further correspondence from you, or your affiliated partners. The stress and mental anguish that your product has cause myself, and my family to suffer is unacceptable. So I ask now that you please refrain from pushing yourself on me any longer.

I have filed a complaint with consumer affairs as well regarding the way you have been conducting business, and they are interested in the outcome of my formal complaint to you. I assure you that I am not going to stand for any more harassment on the part of you, your products, or any of your affiliated partners, and I will go as far as filing a formal complaint with G.O.D if it is so required.

This will be my last correspondence with you personally, and I appreciate you understanding the seriousness in my complaint. I no longer wish to live my life in fear at the hands of your company. I have shared my complaint with many others, who are also dissatisfied with the service they have witnessed and/or received. I will take this issue global if my needs are not met and my opinion is not validated.

I thank you in advance for your understanding and I hope that we have no further issues in the future.

K. Paterson